a beautiful pain coliding with the solitary notions of my mind.....
increasing the numbness... decreasing the pain....
watching the beautiful trail of smoke covering my breathe....
it is constant... unlike my breathe... fluctuating its path....
and the nerves decieve my body...
like the heart decieves my soul...
and the brain hammorrages slowly....
heating the nerves... cooling the blood...
making no mtion what so ever...
the numbness covers the body, blood and soul....
silenced..............

so thereby i go.....
i flow i flow....
and the journey begins...............
and the journey ends..............
endless this journey seems to go on......
and whenever i feel i reached my goal........
my goal, the seeming illusion......
carries me further to flow and flow.....

flow till the time is gone....
flow till the meaning is found....
the meaning of this illusionary life forever seems to go on and on.............

why does it shiver today..........
my silence... insecure of its being...
the image floats in the lake....
disturbed by unwanted pebbles and stones.....
why does it shiver today...
my silence frustrated with her soul.................
a strange wind passes by........ a current somewhere did flow............

numbed beauty surprised by its nature.....
the drop brings the blood to flow............
my blue veins... can feel the heat.......
its horrifying... its insecure.........

the stoned eyes disturbed by the dust.....
the sand penetrates as the wind blows....
making the lids flap one flap two.....
breaking the spell disturbing the flow..................

and so i stand withstanding the storm.......
for the dust wont make me flow............
the silence is long lived.... will come back to me again.....
the insecure breathe will be numbed again...
and in my silence i will feel secure....
for nothing can doom me again........
beautifully silenced........

silence......... what does it mean... an urge? a question? or an identity?
emotions that were never expressed... or lack of any emotion...
a lonely heart... or an overcrowded street... a haunted room of past... or the hollow mansion of present...
is it a word... a noun... adjective or a theory...
and most importantly............ why does it all matter... the point is that it is all silent.............................
and silence is what matters... it is all that i treasure... that i truly completely lay myself on... cause if it is not this silence........................ my life would have been so empty... for silence fills it to content.........
beautifully silenced.................................